I had an opportunity last night to be reminded of how precious my children are to me, I also got to see how quickly they change and grow. As I was going through watching old videos I had recorded I saw my precious Jeremiah and Caidence when they were my only two and then when right after we had Isabelle before Ethan was even though of. I got to see their sweet faces that still had some baby chubbs on them. I got to hear their precious voices, it’s crazy how even their voices change so much and you don’t even realize it.
I also go to see my babies practically grow in front of my eyes and I realized the exact point in which Jeremiah went from young child to my little boy. Watching it seemed like it just flew by so quickly and then to see them now is incredible. Part of that made me sad, I know I’ll never get those baby years back and you start to question yourself as a parent. You wonder if you’ve done things right or if you made it good enough for them, and then I remember how just a couple days ago Jeremiah and Caidence leaped into my arms telling me they loved me so much that they would never let me go. Also, how I see Jeremiah growing each day into a young man. He has such a heart for others as does Caidence and it warms my heart so and I’m so thankful for my Savior Jesus Christ because without Him myself and my children would be nothing like we are today.
I also had to take the time to think this morning when I sat with all 4 of my children watching them eat their breakfast of chocolate chip waffles and sausage I realized that Isabelle and Ethan are in the stages that Jeremiah and Caidence were going through in the videos I watched last night, and I look forward to watching my children grow and learn and love and I intend on being the very best for them I can possibly ever be with the Lord’s help.
So, to all you parents, hold onto this time yes, but also don’t be sad because although they are growing quickly and it seems like a flash before your eyes they are precious in every stage of life, just give them what they need, your love and the knowledge of Christ. Share these things with them daily and it will all be alright.
Baby Ethan arrived on December 3rd, at 5:40pm. He weighed 7lbs. 13oz. and was 20in. long
he took a lot longer to get here than anyone had expected, but he was well worth the wait!! Shortly after he was born we noticed that his breathing was really labored, he was just working way too hard to get his breaths in and was breathing too hard, so the nurse took a look at him and then they took him into the nursery which was very hard for us because we wanted him to stay with us the entire time but we needed to make sure he was ok. Well, a couple of hours passed by and they kept telling us everything looked fine, he just wasn’t getting any better but they were going to watch him for a couple more hours. So, a couple more hours went by and they came back in and said they were going to be doing an x-ray to see if he had something more going on than just a little extra fluid in his lungs that needed to come out, they came back and told us that the results were fine that they found nothing wrong but they were going to keep him in the nursery still overnight to keep an eye on him.
The next morning we still hadn’t heard anything but then his pediatrician came in and told us that they were going to do one more x-ray to see if anything had changed since his breathing was still the same. After a while we went into the nursery to sit and snuggle with him in there and his pediatrician came to say she was going to talk with us for a few minutes. All along, they told us he may have to stay in the hospital for about 2 days until he got better and that we may be able to stay in the transition room with him so I was really hoping we wouldn’t have to leave without him I’ve never had to leave a baby at the hospital and wasn’t looking forward to having to possibly do that this time around. When she sat down with us, she said that his breathing was getting a little bit better but that he was just having trouble eating since they couldn’t feed him until his breathing had slowed down and even then he wasn’t very interested in eating. But, then came the bad news, she told me he had pneumonia and at that point I just broke, started balling my eyes out and then she told us something else that I didn’t know but that he would have to stay in the hospital for 10 days (8 of those days would be without us) and that I was totally unprepared for and then I REALLY broke down. I didn’t know how I was going to leave my baby there, how could we bring ourselves to do that. I believe that is the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.
Thankfully they let us stay until late that night at dinnertime so we went in a few more times after that to see him and then the final time came it was so hard to walk out of that room and walk away from him knowing he would be there without us for that long. When the nurse wheeled me out the elevator was right down the hall from the nursery and moving through that elevator door watching as we went past the nursery door was just horrible and I broke down once again. Now we’ve finally gotten past the first few days and it has gotten a tiny bit easier just knowing that it won’t be much longer and that we do get to go see him everyday and also the thing that has made it be able for me to manage is just seeing how the nurses and pediatricians in the nursery really do truly care for each and every one of these babies, I was watching one of them the other day she was just rubbing one babies head talking so sweetly to him it was precious and it did my heart good to see that. Now we’ve only got 7 more days until we get to go to the transition room and stay with him and I can’t wait!!
He’s now doing much better, they did have to put in a feeding tube since he was having trouble eating very well but now he’s getting a bottle at every other feeding and he actually took a bottle for me for the first time yesterday, I had tried to feed him the first day he was born but he wouldn’t take it at all I never thought I would be so happy to have my baby take a bottle from me!
Since Ethan is going to be staying in the hospital for a while I’m not going to continue blogging back on the 15th, but I will start back on the 20th.